Inside:

I agree that intercultural relationships have bigger challenges. So yes, it is I think harder to make things work smoothly when you don’t have the same background. In any relationship there will be misunderstandings. The difference I think with intercultural ones is the basis of those misunderstandings. In the beginning of a relationship, that basis is logically still unknown. That’s where things can get tricky and you may get some unpleasant surprises. It important to become aware of the “why” of your partners actions and choices. So a good time investor will be to discover and learn to understand your partners motivation behind those actions/choices. That can be any small or big thing. You’ll have to ask instead of filling in the blanks yourself. And that may seem easier that it actually is if you are annoyed or frustrated! But if you really feel that you love someone it will be easier to master the patience to accomplish this. The counting to ten does help!:)

Outside:

This is where I also want to tell people about my own story. I don't know if anyone will recognize themselves in what I have written down here. But if there’s one person, he or she may benefit something from my experiences. 
I'm engaged to my boyfriend who is from Senegal. We've been living together for quite some time now. We're going strong as a couple and we're very much in love. However I do want to point out some things that are not so easy to handle. 

I believe due to the outside pressure that a lot of other people put on me and my partner, things were more difficult than they would have been, had it been just be the two of us (not depending on anyone else to live our lives how we wanted to). That to me was the hardest part. When you’re independent and free, live is so much easier. When you don’t have to deal with third parties who oppose your relationship and who you also depend on for some work income (and/or not to turn you in), it’s a different story. My boyfriend is an artist in the field of dance. So he gets a lot of female attention and also many people around him always claim to know what is in his best interest. That small world of the African dance followers and performers can be a very nasty one so I was to discover.

There was hardly any couple like us around; same age, both young, both not yet settled down with a diploma, steady job or income. It seemed ‘everyone’ disagreed with our relationship. (Not my or his family, to be clear.) Real love and mutual attraction between the two of us wasn’t something that many 'bystanders' seemed to be able to tolerate. I wasn’t going to give him what he needed, they all said behind my back (Senegalese ánd Dutch). “Now is not the time for love, you need to find yourself someone who can get you a permit”, they told him. There were plenty of older woman who would do God knows what to make him see just that. That was my biggest shock for real! Never in a million years had I expected people to respond to my relationship in such a way. Even though I always kept a distance between myself and that ‘world’. I found so much disrespect, resentment and utterly shameless behaviour. It took me quite some time to see the game for what it really is. And sadly it’s just a simple market and demand game. (Young African men with older and richer European woman.) If you don’t fit in there, you’re bound to run into trouble. Which we did but have overcome. I’m an idealist and a damn suborn one too, but that experience did manage to take a bit of my trusting nature away from me.

So the most difficult thing to overcome in any intercultural relationship that resembles mine in any way would definitely be: THE OTHERS. Please stuff your ears ladies and gentlemen and pay no mind to what others have to say about you and your love.

All your choices are right choices if they are taken from the heart. So don’t worry: if you are true to each other you will prevail. A lie never lasts.